Ellie chronicles

Some parts from this lyric that connect to me...

Hope is all that i got! Someday!!!

Recent developments, encounters, events, statements, incident around me really give a toll on me. I felt lethargic and brittle. My head spun. At time tears drop unconsciously. The heart devastated and sank. Mind aint stop thinking. Most of the times, I lost myself in the crowd. I translated and observed closely every encounter. I read the emotion lies between the lines. Made reflection. Tried to make sense out of it.

I counted every possibility. I wrote every fortune endowed to others. I jot down my misfortune. I enjoyed the others smooth ride. I experienced my own bumpy, craggy ride. I ran in others’ tunnel with chandeliers on. I crawled in my own tunnel with flickers of light and hope.

I braced myself to continue crawling. The knees were swollen. Tried to stand up with whatever left in me. It was damn hard. Keep holding on...but I fell down many times. Hurt my ankle. Half way I felt tired. Hell, the tunnel is long. Many times my body tried to stop. Exhaled every breath. I lost hope. I scared. No more tears. Dry. Only blood and sweat.

I am crawling with whatever left.....
I am praying to be in your tunnel..........





Hazami - Kiblat ku

Sejauh mana pun ku lari
menggapai hasrat yang terpendam
biar berkali rebah ku bangun
walau payah

ku himpun kudrat dan harapan
mengiringi azam yang usang
sinar seakan pudar

bila terbit sang suria
begitulah semangat tegar
meskipun musimkan silih berganti
ku terus melangkah
daku gagahi
mencari arah
oh Tuhan sinarilah kiblatku

keringat diteman embunan
kicau unggas turut berdoa
purnama bagai tenangkan perang didalam hati
ku himpun kudrat dan harapan
mengiringi azam yang usang
sinar seakan pudar

kala sujudku pada kesyukuran
dalam mimpi ada sedih
menghantui andai ku alpa
langit kejayaanku
berkiblat padaMU hanya satu

March is almost at the exit door, I have the mixed feeling towards March…why??
March reminds me how much progress that I have made this year…in fact none, the list in the diary left untouched, I am still unable to delete the list…sigh!!! 3 months gone without nothing to be proud of unless mundane routine.


March also brought too many memories and pains which I endure last year, yes March last year still brought me tears and how deluded moron I was…or I am…. Surely I have learnt a lot and I don’t want it regurgitates because the heart still feel the twinge of agony, sinking and it is not easy to heal!!! Enuff said!!!

31 December

We were enthralled with Murano and Venice and after 2 days in Locanda Conterie, we bid farewell and knew deep down in our heart that would be our last visit..huhu...

Our flight to UK scheduled on 1 Jan, so we stayed a night at B & B (bed and no breakfast yaa) at San Dona. To get there, we have to go through obstacles...huhu...

First - the bus ticket, to board a bus in Italy, we needed to buy the ticket only via designated machine..usually near to the bus stand and rest assure, the machine is bilingual or trilingual, I supposed, as it appears instruction in Italy, English and French. Of course, we were baffled what to do but after observing local people, we learned and managed to get the billet. (actually it is ok to buy the billet from driver, just it is a bit expensive...and most local people have ACTV card..macam kad bulanan laa)

Second - Bus....we know exactly the number and place to wait but whenever we asked the driver, they just said no and cabut..so?? we asked the local and after we missed 2 buses, we finally boarded the bus....

Third - the question is where on earth via San Dona?? Everything written in Italian, none spoken English and the place look similar. Then, we braced ourselves to ask one of the lady we encountered at the airport. She didn't tell us the exact location so using only our intuition we stopped and after asking 4 local people and 2 non-friendly senile ladies, we finally reached the B&B. One thing about Italy, many of its people especially the young generation able to converse themselves in English unlike French.

At the hostel, we met couple from Spain and on that new year night I was blessed to experience snow. Of course there was a commotion outside when the clock stroke midnight, but we just ignored and we only realized the snow till 5 in the morning and went hullabaloo about it!!! hehehe...Yes, snow in Venice, and to kampung gurl like me who only watched snow flakes in telly, cartoon and Manchester United magazine, surely my heart jumped with joy!!! Thank you Allah and I will forever cherish this experience as I know I wont have the chance to see more in the future!!!









1 January 2009

Headed to Piazzale Roma, took ACTV bus (nama syarikat operasi bus, Rapid Fire, Transnasional etc in Mesia)to Marco Polo Venice Airport. The Piazzale Roma is Venice's gateway to all transportation mode, you can get vaporetto, buses (orange line) and can take taxis to Mestre, train station.


Piazzale Roma

It was a wonderful journey to Italy, to observe its people with latest fashion statement, holding latest design of LV from top to the bottom and deep down I pray that the visit is not the last, hope that one fine day I can put my humble feet in Rome and Milan.

That's about all, my humble and meagre memoirs of the trips to Europe....of course I was unable to visit many places.....but am more than happy, with the pray granted by Him and with my meagre income I still can reach these places......

Life is really unpredictable affairs. One minute you are happy, one minute you heart sank and devastated, the other minute you lose hope and you do have a mix feeling (no, that nothing to do with hormone...smirk). It is hard to endure, to survive and remain unscathed from the scare. Whatever life has to offer, just take it, face it.....always expect the best and prepare for the worst! What more just keep holding and never losing grip.

Life can be freaking irony sometimes......even though your life is too miserable, your future is too blurry to see, here you are still offering and guiding others, alleviating one spirit, keep pushing others to reach for the best in their future!!!
Keep telling others not to stop believing in their self though you probably losing yours!!! That is life........

When your day fill with tears, frustration and sorrow just keep holding on and don't stop believing!!!






p/s How I wish I could siphon things I have in my mind here!!!

picture courtesy of Getty images

Final result - Aston Villa(1)- Manchester United (2)

First and hopefully not the last for this season..

Glory-Glory Manchester United!!!

Next day (30 December 2008), after having breakfast in the hotel, which merely 3 small packets of hard bread and hot chocolate, we headed to Venice Island, the land renowned for its romantic land, breathtaking and picturesque view with unique gondola ride and magnificent architecture works.


Upon arrival at Venice, the city of merchant, we were mesmerized with the beauty which inviting me to explore the island that never fails to attract tourists all over the globe...though it was cold, we presumed nearly 1 degree or below at that time, which meant leaving gloves was molto stupido…hehehe...


One can easily get lost in Venice due to its similar features, buildings, bridges, routes so don’t be too frantic to be trapped in the same place over and over again or to be bothered by people asking for directions to get somewhere…..hehehe…So, we just sauntered along San Marco Square, feast our eyes with Venetian lace, admiring the touch of Roman sculpture on the murals, inhaled idyllic, cool, breeze air and denied constantly the temptation from pizza outlets…hehehe…and do a lot of window shopping...so we just bought memorabilia and t-shirts to family and friends...

Personally, Venice very much reminds me of Pn Sharifah’s photo albums which we (Kittyna, Ian and me...hehehe) flipped one evening in her house back in the year 2003 (I think) and to put my humble feet on the Venice soil signified that I had realized one of the aims …though I might not able to fulfill all (Holland, Rome, Lauterbrunnen, Switzerland for that matter)


The only sour note, I unintentionally dropped my camera and further detail explain it really like rubbing salt to the severe injury…….


In the meantime, just enjoy the photos here….and seriously Puan Sharifah’s photo albums are much better than this so called digital thingy.




Venice Island, Italy




Gondola




Gondola ride (Euro80 per-person)









St Mark Square, Bell towers....(Dodge)





Venetian Lace






shops and more shops.....


Next – Journey around the mainland of Venice and Piazella Roma.

As for now ciao