Ellie chronicles

Yesterday evening...quite late evening I have a meeting with my sv....it was unplanned as I thought to meet her next week  quite unprepared to put forward idea and to argue...so it was not a good meeting..ermmm...of course I should do much better next time and I subtly agree that to be at this stage I must have a sharp mind anytime and anywhere, especially when things like this prevail again..... 


To fully engage in one study also meant that I have to be ready to make a decision...be responsible to decide what to do, to focus, methodology to be employed, to be affirmed in my choice...and dare to accept whatever consequences later in viva-voce...huhuhu and I would rather be in nebolous situation now rather than later...


My journey to the pinnacle of human achievement, so to speak, though I bet to differ on this,  is 4 months old, nevertheless myriad of things gained and learnt.. if I ever put them into a book I guess mine is already in volume 2..hehehe...


Indeed this is a journey of the life time, a solemn endevour... experience and joyful thing enticing though the apprehension grows...For me that is the beauty of Allah creation....a concoction of feeling signify how feeble human is, realizing it suffice for me that Allah is the best decision maker, whatever come is the best for me and never, I pray to you Allah, never, to make me alone and unattended in each decisions and path that I make..never leave my fate on my own...


Ermm more decision to be made today....where to study arr?? where to start to amend the framework? huhu....till next entry peep!! 

With the aim to get better place to live for next3x semester,to have tranquility and peace of mind to study, when that opportunity knocked at the door as fated by Allah, without second thought I have packed my beg within few hours (hihi...nothing much in the wardrobe), checked out from a lousy college and checked in to another sanctuary...ermm....okla...nothing can compare those facilities and amenities provided by univ in first world country, universities in here are too much lack behind in many ways...from books, database, colleges and even to the bus schedule...huhuhu (a bus schedule is a matter most to me as am car less)

I think this blog need to moving on as well, perhaps a change is a good word, change the layout and template may be...well let see if I have the mood to do so...now it is not a matter of time as I have a luxury to choose between preoccupy myself in journal and academic reading (ouch....so damn serious) or indulging myself with FB, blogs, twitter, online games, movies, hang out, lazing around and simply doing nothing...so time will tell if those change really in place...

Sometimes I can see people around me moving on as well...to the path that good or path that only destruct himself/herself and people around. Probably life experience, reading and comparing one self and others' fortune, a luxury so called time, new worthy circle of friends, new environment embrace might be causes of moving on.....well..those act as perimeter to monitor with watchful eyes and heart to gauge my own life and probably a time will tell that me have to move too....

Zulhijjah is at the dawn...All Muslims will celebrate Muharam which denotes a new Hijri Calendar 1433...new year coming with new trial and tribulation to renew faith to Him and many good things awaiting...hopefully...1432 was not a great one when I lost my father but for some 1432 bring happiness...

It nearly 12. 15 here...a good time to move slowly to the bed....

p/s - so sad to hear that some families in Kelantan and Terengganu need to move on to secure and better place due to flood..Pray that they will keep the faith and pray that those families of mine and whoever back in Kelantan safe and be strong with this trial and tribulation in life..

This is the life that it meant to be...a life that I would never expect...and thinking over it everyday with the thought of quieting always linger at the back of my feeble mind...huhu...Yes, I need to have more than a courage to face, deal, outwit whatever storm, trial and tribulation in this journey. Quieting even at the initial stage sounds premature or anti-climax but losing a father a few days after me registered myself in UK...M (reality bites huh!!) is a valid justification. Seriously post-losing scenario is horrendous and ferocious to endure..particularly trying to juggle between taking care of a mother and to be always on my toes in my study. Seriously for those who read this entry either you know me or not please pray and doa for me to be strong and tough and Allah will endow me His strength and success too as He has granted upon others.

Will I quit? Will I survive? Watch this space...as I will write more on my journey..sometimes and I think most of the time it is better to write things here or meroyan here rather than elsewhere.